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3 October 1981 · 20 episodes
Saturday Night Live aired its seventh season during the 1981–1982 television season on NBC. The seventh season started on October 3, 1981 and ended on May 22, 1982. A total of 20 episodes were broadcast. Following the dismissal of producer Jean Doumanian and most of her cast members, the show was shut down due to the commencement of the 1981 WGA strike. Dick Ebersol, the program's developer, was hired as Doumanian's replacement. The new cast of Saturday Night Live for this season were the same ones from the episode Ebersol produced on the April 11, 1981 episode: Robin Duke, Tim Kazurinsky and Tony Rosato along with the Doumanian era's sole survivors Eddie Murphy and Joe Piscopo. Denny Dillon and Gail Matthius were fired following the April 1981 episode while Laurie Metcalf and unseen castmember Emily Prager weren't asked back to be cast members on the show. Ebersol then hired two new cast members: Mary Gross and Christine Ebersole. Both were hired to fill the gap left by Metcalf and Prager. Wanting to distance the show from its first five seasons, Ebersol cut the popular opening line Live from New York, It's Saturday Night! from the cold openings. In fact, sometimes cold openings weren't even shown and the monologues were skipped over almost entirely. These changes were not permanent, as Ebersol decided to reverse them for the eighth season.
1. (no host)/Rod Stewart, Tina Turner
4 October 1981
Sketches include ""Our Age is Showing,"" ""The Little Richard Simmons Show,"" ""The Clams"" (film), ""Nuns on the Beach,"" ""A Few Minutes With Andy Rooney,"" ""Prose and Cons"" (film), ""The Khaddaffi Look,"" ""Ruth Deals With Rod,"" ""Andy Warhol,"" Juggling with Michael Davis, and ""Season of Glass"" (film).
11 October 1981
Sketches include ""McDonald & Wife,"" ""The Bizarro World,"" ""Buckwheat Sings,"" ""Skanky Fiancee,"" ""Cheap Laffs,"" and ""The Alan Alda Guide to Sensitivity."" The Kinks performed ""Destroyer"" and Christine Ebersole performed ""Single Bars and Single Women."" Also featured is an Anwar Sadat tribute film.
18 October 1981
Sketches include ""To Tell the Truth Gone Awry,"" ""Mister Robinson's Neighborhood #2,"" ""Velvet Jones #1,"" and ""Harry Anderson's Grappler Tricks.""
1 November 1981
Sketches include ""Vomiting for Luck,"" ""Jogger Motel,"" ""Profiles in British Courage,"" ""Last Night I Killed My Husband"" (musical number), ""Sugar Breakfast"" and ""Andy Warhol's TV."" Fear performed ""I Don't Care About You"" and medley of ""Beef Bologna,"" ""New York's Alright If You Like Saxophones,"" and ""Let's Have A War.""
8 November 1981
Sketches include: Here's 'Cos, Dressing Room, Hail to the Chief, TransEastern, Whisper, Cheap Laffs, Harlequin Romances, Reach Out, Velvet Jones School of Technology, Big Baser, Push Button to Explode Building, Bitter People, Schiller's Reel: Art is Ficial.
6. Bernadette Peters/Billy Joel, The Go-Go's
15 November 1981
Johnny Keep Your Gun Clean, Escape from New York Films, I Married a Monkey, A Message to Young White Viewers, Hidden Photo, Bedtime Story, Man Ray and Mic, Sketch in the Dark, 42nd Street, Nick the Knock, Rock 'N Roll Heaven Incorporated.
7. Tim Curry/Meat Loaf and the Neverland Express
6 December 1981
Texxon, Mick!, Illegitimate Son, The Trouble with Fred, Frank & Papa, Tim and Meat's One Stop Rocky Horror Shop, The Zucchini Song, If Reagan had Survived the Assassination.
8. Bill Murray/The Spinners, Yale Whiffenpoofs
13 December 1981
Sketches include ""The Phone Company,"" ""Tales of the Unlikely,"" ""Washed-Up Tom Snyder,"" ""MX-5 Tampons,"" and ""The Economics of Christmas."" The Spinners perform ""I'll Be Around.""
9. Robert Conrad/Allman Brothers Band
24 January 1982
Sketches include: The People's Court, In the News, Wild Wild Wild West, Babies in Makeup, Overexposed Characters, Battle of the Week, A Few Minutes with Andy Rooney, The Nixon Mansion, Family Tradition.
10. John Madden/Jennifer Holliday
31 January 1982
Sketches include: Locker Room, Johnny Carson School of Acting, Jogger Hotel, Betty Beer, Poetry Corner, The Lou Grant Show, The Uncle Tom Show, Inside Story, Mob Nicknames, Super Bowl to Saturday Night Live and Solomon & Pudge.
11. James Coburn/Mick Fleetwood, Lindsay Buckingham
7 February 1982
Sketches include: President's Birthday, Reach Out, I Married a Monkey, Mr. Robinson Neighborhood, Jesus in Blue Jeans, Crazy Mary Gay Jim, Victims of 60 Minutes, Magnificent Analyst, The Khaddaffi Look, Unique Perspectives, Those Crazy Taboosters.
12. Bruce Dern/Luther Vandross
21 February 1982
Sketches include: Backstage, Ski Date, Who Do You Hate, Focus On Film. The Bizarro World, Songwriters, The Mild One, Fracas, Flying, Melina's Cafe.
13. Elizabeth Ashley/Hall and Oates
28 February 1982
Sketches include: CBS Evening News, Damn Plastic Bubble, Speaking as a Woman, African Tour, Musical Performance "You Make My Dreams", Joseph Papp Auditions, Musical Performance "I Can't Go For That", Girls to Women, Lowembrau, Musical Performance "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling"
14. Robert Urich/Mink De Ville
21 March 1982
Sketches include ""He's No Burt Reynolds,"" ""Paul Harvey Radio News,"" ""Golden Age Obedience School,"" and ""Koala Bear Embryo."" Mink De Ville performed ""Maybe Tomorrow.""
15. Blythe Danner/Rickie Lee Jones
28 March 1982
Sketches include ""Lorne Greene,"" ""The New Celibacy,"" ""20/20,"" ""The Uncle Tom Show,"" ""Senior Spring Fling '82,"" ""Meet the People,"" and ""Help Out Blythe Danner."" Rickie Lee Jones performed ""Pirates"" and ""Lush Life.""
16. Daniel J. Travanti/John Cougar
11 April 1982
Sketches include ""Save Larry the Lobster,"" ""Whiners' Anniversary,"" ""Hill Street Blues,"" ""Too Many Ethel Mermans,"" and ""Career Corner."" John Cougar Mellencamp performed ""Hurts So Good.""
18 April 1982
Sketches include: The Train of Life, The Honeyrooneys, Musical Performance "Empty Garden", Last Request, Next Week, Musical Performance "I Walk The Line", "Folsom Prison Blues", "Ring of Fire", Hail To The Chief, Jay Clay gets Depressed, Tegrim, Showmanship & Flash, Musical Performance "Ball & Chain", Train Poet, Black Talk, Reach Out, Musical Performance "Sunday Morning Coming Down"
18. Robert Culp/Charlie Daniels Band
25 April 1982
Sketches include: Tennis Club Locker Room, Middle Age of Aquarius, Party Girl, Musical Performance "Still in Saigon", Egg & Sperm, James Brown is Annie. U.S.S. Cunningham , Babies In Makeup, Happy's, Musical Performance "The Devil Went Down to Georgia"
16 May 1982
Sketches include ""Louis DePalma's Revenge,"" ""The Executive Test,"" ""The Whiners on an Airplane,"" ""Solomon and Pudge,"" ""Enzo,"" and ""Looks at Books."" Sparks performs ""Mickey Mouse."" Also, Brian Doyle-Murray interviews recently humbled actor-wrestler Andy Kaufman.
23 May 1982
Sketches include ""Ebony & Ivory,"" ""I Married a Monkey,"" Grease, ""Hitler In Heaven,"" and ""Ballpark Organ Favorites."" ONJ performs the hit ""Physical"" in lieu of the opening monologue.