Big, boozy Biology teacher Lindsay joins Summerdown, convinced she can drink anyone under the table. Brian is delighted, until Kurt convinces him that Lindsay fancies him. Bob’s been thrown out by his wife in favour of the satellite T.V. man, Matt wants to end the affair with Penny, and Carol is pregnant!

Penny drives everyone insane with her self absorption until Lindsay finally cracks and tells her to shut up. Brian has switched from drinking lager to vodka, resulting in his vomiting; Bob is still sleeping in his car after his wife threw him out ; and the staff indulge in testing Liz’s temper—resulting in a barrage of four-letter fury!

Kurt tries to give up smoking to impress a mother that he met at open evening, while all the staff secretly hold bets as to how long he will last. Brian gets told that he is boring, when he asks Matt why Kayla is failing his class. It is only when he talks to Liz about Fascism that he discovers the real reason behind her daughter’s academic problems.

For the first time in her hard-hearted life, Liz takes pity on the dishevelled wreck that Bob has become. But mix up pity with alcohol and the results can be very surprising.

As Lindsay turns 30 the group discuss her attitude on the matter. Matt throws a party for his wife, who is also turning 30, but is disappointed when he discovers that Lindsay won’t be having a party to keep Brian and Kurt away from his house. This is due to their recent fascination with what she looks like, which is making Penny jealous. Later on at the party, Penny gets her revenge on Matt by proving that no matter how perfect he claims his life is, she can always influence the kind of selfish decisions he makes.

The teachers are assigned to pairs in an attempt to make them share their problems and make them more sociable to other staff. Lindsay and Matt are paired up, which makes Penny jealous.

Simon returns to Summerdown with a fully-grown beard. He tells everyone that he has been sleeping his way around the world, but after a grilling from Brian and Kurt things are not what they seem. He is given an opportunity to substitute, when a flu epidemic wipes out most of the English department. However, Simon proves to be very unpopular with most as he finds himself caught up in a messy love triangle.

An unwilling Matt takes over as head of English when Bob is taken into hospital, but his early intentions to remain one of the gang soon go right out of the window.

The gang grow depressed at their single lives, pondering their inability to sustain a relationship, until Liz points out that Brian and Kurt are as good as married and seem to have the perfect partnership. Simon receives a job at a new school and ponders what his future may be like.

After receiving repeated complaints from parents and staff, all of which result in a formal warning, Lindsay takes a radical step and turns to Bob for help in keeping her job. Can the guru turn her into a ‘super teacher’?

Brian becomes more obsessed with dinner lady Eileen, and soon comes to her rescue when Bob complains about the canteen food. This wins him a date with her, but he becomes so infatuated with her that he leads himself to believe that they are in a long term relationship, which he sadly ends after he claims that it isn’t “working”. He feels gutted however, when he realises that he never slept with her even when it was offered.

Lindsay bets Penny that Matt and Kurt are completely alike when it becomes apparent that they are both tight when it comes to giving to charities.

Penny embarks on a new romance. In a drunken moment Matt and Lindsay find themselves in a compromising situation. The two spend the rest of the week avoiding their feelings for one another. After hearing that the human pupils dilate when looking at someone you love, Brian and Kurt try it out with everyone. It only proves successful however, when they look at each other. Meanwhile, Clare discovers Bob’s secret ‘weapon’ and has sex with him on her porch.