The Surreal Life (2003)
The Surreal Life (2003)
The Surreal Life is a reality television series that sets a select group of past-their-prime celebrities and records them as they live together in Glen Campbell's former mansion in the Hollywood Hills for two weeks. The format of the show resembles that of The Real World and Road Rules, in that the cameras not only record the castmates' participation in group activities assigned to them, but also their interpersonal relationships and conflicts. The series is also likened to The Challenge in that previously known individuals from separate origins of entertainment are brought together into one cast. The show's first two seasons aired on The WB, and subsequent seasons have been shown on VH1.

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3x01 Six Degrees of Irritation

06 September, 2004 5:00 am
See this year's cast arrive in their respective rides. You'll never believe who's on this year's show! Room politics get under way and Charo takes charge while Jordan bums out at the lack of privacy. The guests start to unwind with a quick swim and a stiff drink and before you know it Brigitte passes out from ""jetlag."" Young'un Ryan seems uncomfortable amongst the colorful characters and Dave is forced to move into the closet because of Flav's snoring. And this is only the beginning!

3x02 Strange Love

13 September, 2004 5:00 am
Love, or at the very least lust, is in the air at the Surreal Life house. Flav and Brigitte frolic in the pool when Ryan's girlfriends come over for a visit. Date night is announced and a wild night ensues. Jordan tries to flirt with Ryan and gets shot down. Dave tries to score while Charo's a snore. Ryan gets mad at Flavor for playing pool late at night and he's forced to console himself in the confines of Brigitte's bed.

3x03 Battle of the Bands

20 September, 2004 5:00 am
The morning paper arrives and informs The Surreal Life residents that they'll be participating in a 'Battle of The Bands' with aspiring teen musicians a la School of Rock. Though the kids are scared by Brigitte's leopard-print bathing suit, they're all excited by the opportunity to rock with such seasoned vets. While Brigitte sleeps off yet another bout of ""jetlag,"" Charo has a mini-melt down and Ryan has a fit. Barry Williams MC's the competition Battle and you'll never guess who's team wins and who takes credit for it.

3x04 Highway to Hell

27 September, 2004 5:00 am
Pack your bags and start up the RV because the Surreal-ers are off to San Diego to see Charo live in concert. Flav tries to get behind the wheel but Dave takes charge and Flavor pouts. Gambling for rooms, the boys get a suite, Ryan cons her own, and Dave moves into another closet. Charo's performance wows the gang and one of her dancer's wows Brigitte, much to Flavor's consternation.

3x05 Surf School

04 October, 2004 5:00 am
Surf's up! The Lifers are going to surf school. Who is going to drive? Flav or Dave? Dave or Flav? By default of a prison record, Dave is the winner and takes the wheel. Flav is ticked off, but, regardless, it's time to hit the beach. Under the supervision of Big Wave surfing champs the Willis Brothers, Dave, Brigitte and Ryan are ready to catch some waves. Charo's carpal tunnel and Jordan's lack of enthusiasm keep them on the beach, and Flav is still pouting about Brigitte's non-stop flirting and his inability to drive. In the end, big bro Willis convinces Flav to check his attitude on the sand and hit the waves.

3x06 Making the Single: Part One

11 October, 2004 5:00 am
Rock and Roll (at least that's what Ryan hopes)! It's time to make a hit record. Jordan puts on his producer shades and the Surreal Lifers are ready to make some magic happen. Jordan quickly turns dictator and does not allow for creative input from Charo or Ryan, creating the ultimate pop song, or in Charo's words ""a crazy salad"". Ryan will not sell out and sing pop. She storms out of the studio leaving the rest of the cast in suspense about whether she will return to contribute her vocals to the record.

3x07 Making the Single: Part Two

18 October, 2004 5:00 am
It's not rock! It's not rock! It's not rock! Ryan is still having a meltdown about the pop song in the bathroom. Jordan's shades must still be on, because with the clock ticking, Jordan is blind to the fact that Dave's mouth trumpeting should not be a priority above laying in Ryan's lead vocals. Charo can't handle Jordan's iron fist and cracks. Still upset, Ryan finds a compassionate ear in Flav and convinces him that Brigitte should take over lead vocals. Unfortunately, Gitte is once again out cold, so with the clock winding down Ryan has no choice but to sing. With no time to spare, ""Live My Life"" is born.

3x08 Haunted Hospital

25 October, 2004 5:00 am
Ghosts, Goblins and Charo, oh my! Halloween is approaching, and what better way to kick off the holiday than to send the Surreal Lifers on a ghost hunt? With the guidance of a paranormal specialist, the cast is sent in groups through an abandoned hospital to search for any signs of the super-natural. Charo prays for the Spanish Armada and Brigitte and Flav run for their lives. The cast still has goose bumps.

3x09 Dirty Laundry

01 November, 2004 5:00 am
It's time for the cast to air out their ""Dirty Laundry"" and the return of Sally Jessie Raphael. First, it's family bonding time at the glamour shots studio. To please Brigitte, Flav takes off the clock and gold teeth and wears a suit for the pictures allowing his alter ego William Drayton to come out and play. Back at home, Sally Jessie Raphael is preparing her attack on the cast. When they arrive, they find that the house is set up as a talk show and they are the guests. Sally does not hold back, and the cast finds out the truth about each other.

3x10 Last Supper and Goodbyes

08 November, 2004 5:00 am
Hurt from Ryan's trash talking on in the last ""Dirty Laundry"" episode, Flavor Flav is not holding back when it comes to pushing her buttons. Charo pleads with Flav to make peace with Ryan, but he will not. At the last supper Flav is the last to show, but eventually makes a very loud entrance. When the goodbye cake comes out, Flav calms down and it's all love. Ryan starts a food fight, and the night ends with Flav and Brigitte taking one last dip in the hot tub. In the morning everyone says their goodbyes and goes their separate ways.

3x11 Best & Worst

15 November, 2004 5:00 am
The cast of the 3rd season of ""The Surreal Life"" talk about their best and worst moments on the show with their roommates and events that happened during the course of the show.

3x12 Lost Moments

06 December, 2004 5:00 am
Although regular episodes of The Surreal Life's historic third season are over, there are a few additional moments that deserve their own spotlight. Beginning with the sick puppy's snot-filled visit with the vet, the season's best, ""Lost Moments"" are highlighted, including Jordan's clumsy attempts at flirting with an uncooperative Ryan Starr. The cast continues a seasonal tradition and delivers brownies to neighbors as an apology for being noisy. They also take a wild trip to a Japanese supermarket and attempt to tame an out-of-control washing machine back at home. These hysterical, only-on-the The Surreal Life lost moments are not to be missed. As the door closes and the lights go out at the Hollywood Hills mansion the night's air is pierced with a final shout, ""Flavor Flav!""

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